


DIL BEPARVAH

by Rarelyshitpostaccount



Category: Shubh Mangal Zyada Saavdhan (2020), Shubh Mangal Zyada Saavdhan (2020) RPF
Genre: F/M, Kartik As An Author, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-19
Updated: 2020-10-30
Packaged: 2021-03-08 00:07:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,321
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26546485
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rarelyshitpostaccount/pseuds/Rarelyshitpostaccount
Summary: No summary just one quote.“We're not just here for us, we're here for others.”
Relationships: Kartik Singh & Goggle Tripathi, Kartik Singh/Aman Tripathi
Comments: 16
Kudos: 27





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, I don't know what this shit is but inspired by a post by @theindianidot on ig.   
> And it's one-shot type fic with two chapters (like anyone care) [one-shot is supposed to be one chapter i guess but anyway].  
> Yes comment down below how much you hated this trashy chapter.
> 
> Bye read this now.  
> : )
> 
> ( Also, There might be some typos, I will reread this tomorrow and will fix it, So i'm sorry for typos.💛 )

17th September 2016, 3:17pm,

Everyone is waiting for Kartik Singh, author of best selling Sci-fi book on the set of GG News.

Kartik enters on the set at 3:30, usually he hates being late but it's just Delhi's traffic and a little bit of his laziness that made him half an hour late.  
Yes 30 minutes is a big thing for Kartik.

The moment Kartik see everyone is waiting he started feeling embarrassed for being late.

The host started coming towards Kartik.

"Hello, Sir shall we start the interview now? It's late already."

"Hey, I'm sorry for being late and yes let's start the interview."

"It's alright sir, here" interviewer said pointing towards the couch.

"Don't call me sir please." Kartik chuckled after completing the sentence.

______________________________________

*On the couch and Cameras rolling.*

Host-  
"Hello Everyone, Welcome Back to our channel."

Camera and light flashes towards Kartik, he waved and smiled.

Host-  
" We have Kartik Singh with us today, an amazing author as all of you might know him, but today he is here to talk to us about himself and not just to talk about his book but about his personal life as well.  
So, Kartik how are you feeling today, I guess it's your first interview about you and not your book, Am I right?"

Kartik-  
"Yes, you are absolutely right and actually I'm quite nervous but much more excited, to let all of my fans know something about me."

Host-  
"Your fans must be excited as well and talking about fans I'm pretty sure they don't know much about you, as you got the 'Sudden Fame' I would say....  
They are clueless about who you are, all we know till now is you are gay, except this information nothing more, all of us clueless about you."

This 'Gay Author' tag annoys Kartik alot, he hates how everyone just mention his sexual orientation for no reason, not actually they get some extra views by mentioning him as 'Gay Author'.  
Also Kartik got double annoyed how the host called his struggles 'Sudden Fame' he worked day and night for 11 years to achieve where he is now and people are calling him 'Sudden Fame'.

Kartik-  
"I think this isn't 'Sudden Fame' or something like that, I had to leave Allahabad my birthplace, the place where I lived for 20 years and in the initial days it wasn't easy to be in Delhi, that too on my own in every way, no financial support, no moral support, no one i could talk to. This isn't sudden fame it's been 11 years now but yes many people got to know about me through this book so I would call this my 'Turning Point' not as 'Sudden Fame'."

Host-  
"Yes, I'm pretty sure that you have earned this place and you said this for the first time on national television right ?"

Kartik-  
"Yes I said this for the first time."

Host-  
"See everyone, we have so many more things that you will get to know first on our channel so stay tuned till the end.   
This brings us to our first break, don't go anywhere we'll be right back."

After two more advertisement breaks and more questions, the episode is just about to end. (Bold)

Host-  
"So, we had lots of fun and so many questions about your life, your struggles in Allahabad, your struggles in Delhi as an author and ofcourse things that makes you happy, things that you like.  
But we haven't discussed about your ex-boyfriend, as you said you are single right now and what happened to your ex-boyfriend none of us know about him.  
What are your plans for your next book is it based on your loved one.   
Would you like to talk about him, only if you are comfortable."

Kartik expected this question so he was quite ready to answer this but not sure if he should answer this question.   
He decided not to because he might end up crying on national television which he totally doesn't want to.

Kartik-  
"No, I think this interview is about me and the part of my boyfriend Aman I like to remember is his how goofy he was, childish but still mature at the same time, how he came into my life as a blessing and much more he was perfect.  
I don't think I ever deserved him and not even this world deserve him.  
He must be in a better place now."   
Kartik said with heavy heart, his eyes were teary but still smiling just by remembering the memories of Aman and sighed after completing the sentence."

Kartik-  
"And I don't think I'm going to write something related to my personal life anytime soon."

Host-  
"So, Kartik Singh this question brings us to the end of this episode.  
As you have received so much love not just from India but worldwide, everyone must me waiting to know about your next book."

Kartik-  
"Yes, I'm releasing my next book soon, 21st February 2017, worldwide and on 20 January 2017, in India.   
Pre order will be available from 15 December, so book your book now." Kartik laughed at his lame joke.

This interview was a very requested one and also to promote his book.

But after the interview Kartik wasn't able to get the idea of writing a book on Aman out of his head.

He was confused if he should do this or not. 

Is this something like, getting money from your boyfriend's death.

These thoughts continued for almost a week so Kartik decided to talk to his bestfriend, Devika.

Kartik:

"Hey"   
"Remember you asked me that i look stressed?"

Devika:

"Yes, finally you want to tell me or what?"

Kartik:

"Yes I'm going to tell you that's why I texted you."

Devika:

"Toh bata bhi yaar, it's 11:30 already."

He felt as if she isn't much interested in his problems and life but both of them know how they just mock each other saying I don't care and stuff.

But they know... both of them that how much important they are for each other, how Kartik was the only person for Devika when she was alone disowned by her own family and when her boyfriend broke up (basically cheated).  
Also, how Devika was there for Kartik when he was new in Delhi all shattered, alone, miserable and guilty of thing which he shouldn't be (that's how Devika think but Kartik's thought on Aman's death is totally opposite, he always said  
'I was the one who was there with him not you, I saw him, no actually i didn't even get to see him for the last time.')

Kartik:

"It's about Aman."   
He wrote with heavy heart, not sure if he should let her know or not.

Devika:

''Okay but what?"  
She got worried as always when it comes to Kartik talking about Aman.

Kartik:

"I went for that interview for promotion of my next book, that host asked me some question related to Aman."

Devika:

"What did he asked?"

Kartik:

"He asked what happened to Aman and if i'm going to write anything related to him."

Devika:

"Okay so how is this something to be stressed about?"

Kartik:

"I'm confused, if I should write a book based on Aman."

Devika:

"I think you should."

Kartik:

"Isn't this unethical, making money out of your boyfriend's death."

Devika:

"Kartik are you stupid!!  
This isn't like making money out of your boyfriend's death, there are so many people who share stories about their loved one.  
I would say write a book on Aman maybe you'll feel better and might finally understand that wasn't your fault."

Kartik:

"Okay, Good night go sleep now it's late."

Karik wanted to talk more to the only person who understands him and let her know everything but at the same time he wasn't ready to talk so he just tried to avoid the conversation.

Devika:

"Good night."

That was an unusual short conversation.   
She knew he is just trying to avoid the main topic but she thought sometimes giving some space is important too. 

Kartik wasn't able to sleep (just like previous week) still confused and sad.

This happened to Kartik atleast twice a year since Aman died.  
This phase wasn't new for him but this feeling was, he felt guilty everytime through this phase but this time he wasn't feeling guilty he had some strong feelings as if, it wasn't his mistake, what happened sixteen years ago wasn't really his mistake, for the first time in all these difficult sixteen years, for the first time he did felt empty but not broken all these mixed up emotions for the first time.

___________________________


	2. WAQT  KI  BAATEIN

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How Aman died and Kartik's feelings & the book. Also, you will get to know if Kartik is publishing the book or not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Late update, i know. The chapter was ready but i wasn't updating because i thought i will upload after getting some support, comments and kudos but i didn't get any (XD) so i'm just updating now.  
> Also, thanks to 4 people who commented on my fic :)♡♡

After two days Kartik finally decided that he will write or atleast try to write a book based on Aman and his relationship.

He sat down in front of the window on couch with laptop and a cup of coffee. Aman and Kartik had planned how they will have a comfy couch in front of window, bedroom, living room everything was planned by Aman.  
Kartik made sure things are exactly how Aman wanted their home but without Aman this place wasn't his home it was just an expensive bungalow in Delhi.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
(On Laptop)

Aman Tripathi, as y'all may know him.  
But my love, my Aman, my life, while writing this I still remember the day quite vividly, when I saw him for the first time 1st September 1992.

It was his 12th birthday, they moved in my colony recently and his mother invited me to that birthday party.  
The first time I saw him in stripped t-shirt and beige color shorts, i don't know if that was "love at first sight" or not... but the thing i knew right then was we are bounded for life long.

He was sitting on the couch with his cousins Rajni and Keshav, there were other kids but he didn't even tried to start a conversation with someone else except his cousins.  
So I decided to start the conversation with him, that was awkward in the starting but till the birthday party got over we were friends and I was the only friend he had from our colony.  
After that party he started coming to my home quite regularly, I introduced him to other kids.  
His school was only till 10th standard so, after 10th standard he changed his school and started going in my school the best two years of my school life not only because we were in the same school but because he was my first boyfriend, that beautiful man was my boyfriend.  
I proposed him after our 10th standard exams got over and he said yes.

We were in the same collage too, I wish we were in different collages, then things might have been different and much much better.

Second year of collage, the worst year of my life, the year when i lost him.

16,August,2000

While I'm writing this down, I'm still confused, what really happened that night.  
Aman and I were 20 at that time and we used to live in Allahabad.  
As both of us were collage students, we were mostly engaged in studies most of the time and used to spend time with each other mostly after collage.  
At that time, we met daily in collage and on sundays we visited a cafe on the outskirts of Delhi. Aman and I were the happiest at that time, those 3 years met daily enjoyed alot each other's company.

We used to go to a park near our colony to play volleyball almost every saturday evening with Shivam he was new at that time in colony and collage, so we used to invite him.  
There were three volleyball court in a row but the last one was a bit different dark and looked a little spooky for some unknown reasons which the elders in the colony knew but not everyone was aware what happened there. Aman's parents told us not to visit there ever.  
Normally everyone would avoid going in there and so did we.

One night as we were going back to our home after playing volleyball, we were throwing ball at each other for fun.  
That's when the ball slipped and ended up rolling at the front door of last court.  
Shivam was superstitious got scared and left without even saying a word.  
Fear was clearly reflecting on Aman's face, I was taking it as joke, i thought just going there won't make a big difference.  
But the difference that stupid mistake of mine made is irreplaceable. 

Somehow he said yes because i told him if he isn't coming with me I'll go all alone, he came with me even when he was shit scared just for me, I was always curious what's there, what is there that everyone is trying to hide.

The moment we entered the last volleyball court, things started getting weird, we felt a strange presence, as if someone else was there, Aman was there with me holding my hand he was scared but acted as if he isn't.  
I started feeling dizzy and fainted.

The next morning I woke up, I was in Aman's home in the guest room.  
I got up from the bed, looking for Aman.  
Aman's mother was crying, sitting in the living and Aman's father was sitting next to her.  
I was about to ask them what is going on, Shivam grabbed my hand and pulled me in the guest room.

"What" I yelled  
"Listen, sit down please." his eyes were swollen, fully red, looking as if he was crying too.

I sat down, he sat next to me.

"Kartik, you are lucky to be alive. When we found you in the night, if was just you, Aman wasn't there."

"Shivam, are you out of your mind? What are you even saying? Can you her yourself?"

"Kartik, please be silent and listen to me firstly. You know, everyone said not to go there."

"Yes" i said with low voice and teary eyes.

"Two twins were found dead there, in unknown mysterious way and after that no one visited that place ever again. That's the reason why I didn't joined two of you and even I alerted you but there was no response so I left. What could possibly I do."

"You didn't, you just ran away. Leaving both of us."

"NO, I was screaming that don't go there."

"What are you saying, Shivam. Stop lying atleast now."

"Kartik, I'm not lying.  
We just found you Aman wasn't there, he died maybe saved your life and lost his own life.  
FOR YOU because of you, because of your stupid curiosity of knowing what is really there.  
You know what is there now?  
Three soul, two twins and Aman's soul because of you.  
He could have ran but he was there for you but now who is sufring in all of this, the one who really loved him, the one how took Aman's life seriously not as a joke Kartik.  
You thought his life is a joke.  
His parents, go look at them know, their only child isn't alive because of your childish and stupid behaviour.  
And you are saying that I'm lying.  
I wish I was lying because he was my friend, I don't think you even loved him.  
If you did loved him. You wouldn't have done this to him."  
Shivam left the room after saying this.

__________________________  
Flashback To Last Night

"AMAN, KARTIK PLEASE DON'T GO THERE. WE WILL GET NEW BALL IT'S NOT SAFE KARTIK. AMAN SAY SOMETHING TO KARTIK ATLEAST. PLEASE. SAY SOMETHING KARTIK."

Shivam continued screaming for 1 (one) minute. 

"OKAY, IF BOTH OF YOU ARE IGNORING ME.  
I'M LEAVING. GO ANYWHERE YOU WANT TO." Shivam left 

Shivam was screaming all of this but neither Aman nor Kartik, no one heard it. They was hardly one hand distance but they couldn't hear him. They didn't turned around to see Shivam and when they turned Shivam was gone. Not there.  
Aman and Kartik assumed he left them to handle on their own, that he is a coward.

[ End Of Flashback ]  
__________________________

After all of this Kartik tried to talk to Aman's parents about the investigation should start and they should file a case.  
But everyone said how that's a paranormal activity and there isn't possibly anything that police could do.  
Aman's parents moved to Banaras again.  
They never contacted me again, I tried to contact them but they never picked up my call and once when they finally picked my call, Aman's father scolded me and said to never contact them.  
I get their anger, they never said this but I know somewhere they blame me for Aman's death....Same Uncle bro.... Same.  
I know you would read this. I blame myself for all of this what happened to you, to me and many others.

I tried to report Aman as missing but I got kicked out of every police station and they said they can't do anything. This continued for 8 (eight) after that, I decided to move out of Allahabad, how Aman and I had planned, we will move to Delhi and will get a beautiful bungalow.

I moved to Delhi in 2001.

In initial years I worked in an advertising company and started writing my first book.  
I published my first book in 2004. The response wasn't great in initial months but in 2005 it blew up, my first book that blew up and I left my job.  
The first half of 2005 was great for me got to know new people after so many years, met Devika, my best friend.  
In the second half of 2005 it all went down fame, money, everything but Devika was there for me, with me, the only person.  
I started working in that company again.  
All of this continued for 11 years, I worked in the company and wrote 6 books.  
In 2015, I decided I should try to publish a book again. That book did really good for me, in 2016 I left the company again and now I'm full time author.  
But the thing, the main thing, comes here.  
In all of these years I blames myself for this how he died because of my curiosity but I never thought how he scarified his life because of me, because he loved me.

In 2005 after I lost all my fame, I got a call from an unknown number, it was him, my Aman.

Kartik :  
"Hello, who's this?"

Unknown Caller :  
"Hey, Kartik"

I froze after hearing this, after hearing his voice, after hearing how lovingly yet normally he said my name.

"Hello, are you there Kartik?"

Kartik :  
"Yes... Yes I'm on the call but Aman"

Aman :  
"I know, I know you have loads of questions but let's just talk now for 10 minutes, if you are free."

Kartik :  
"No... I'm not busy, Aman and please just talk to me." 

I wasn't able to believe all of this but that was true. I was crying and sobbing while talking.  
We talked for 40-50 minutes, I asked him about that night but after hearing this he disconnected the call.  
I was shocked, unable to process what just happened, we were talking and he just disconnected the phone call.  
I tried to reach the number but it was showing unavailable, that number doesn't exist.  
I told everything to Devika about this, she didn't believe me but after I insisted so much she acted as if I'm right and she also said it was a hallucination it happens when you loose a loved one.  
I tried to contact his family no one responded for a week but after, one week Goggle picked up my call and said that Aman's body was found at the same volleyball ball court in 2002............  
.  
.  
.  
.  
.  
.  
(Kartik didn't publish this book.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts?  
> That's the end of this fic. Comment please i would love to know if y'all liked this fic. Also, I wouldn't be uploading much on this account as the username says "RARELYSHITPOSTACCOUNT" i will just post 'TRASH WORK' here and 'RARELY' for sure.
> 
> BYE, go COMMENT 🔫🔫🔫.

**Author's Note:**

> What do you think will he write a book or not?  
> What did really happened sixteen years ago?  
>  Well you will get to know in the next chapter but let me know your thoughts.
> 
> And obviously Aman will be there in last and second chapter.
> 
> So, I haven't completed the 2nd chapter yet and i don't think i'll be updating this in September.  
>  (I will update this before 3rd October by the way. ) 
> 
> Let me know if you liked this chapter.  
> This is my first fic :D


End file.
